Entry Numero Uno: My Post-Pregnancy Diet

Everyone is always commenting on how much weight I have lost since having a baby and to be quite frank, I am sick of it. It's like if I were at the other end of the spectrum (i.e. morbidly obese), no one would say anything. But, no. I'm skinny as hell. Smaller, in fact, than I was prior to getting knocked up and barreling forward on a gastronomic warpath. (Seriously, it's a wonder I still have both hands because honest to God, I was so hungry sometimes - okay, all the time - I thought I would eat them.)

Why? I really have no explanation for it. I can say, however, the rigors of motherhood (i.e. carrying around a 16lb. bundle of humanity around all day, ascending the front steps with a carseat containing a 16lb. bundle of humanity, having the life sucked out of me every 3 hours, etc.) can definitely be held at least somewhat accountable.

That being said, what led me to reflecting on this in the first place was my culinary decision for the afternoon. While Anja slept those precious minutes, I was forced to make a creative decision not only for the sake of efficiency but also as a result of not having been to the grocery store for an extended period of time.

So, I took a look in my cupboard and found a package of white cheddar mac n' cheese (because "white cheddar" makes it a more upscale choice for the culinary elite, such as myself). It has been in there since when I was still pregnant. (I remember buying it around 3 or 4 months in a sudden fit of craving in between my usual all-day sickness. By the time I got to the checkstand, it was repulsive to me. I bought it anyway and there it has sat until today.) To make a long story short, this is what I decided to have for lunch. Not to mention the fact that, in the spirit of feeling like a kid again, I slathered it with ketchup, a little trick I learned from my mother as a young scamp. (I might note that she learned it during a brief stint in the Navy while working on a tugboat.) In all of its processed cheese, sodium-laden glory, I consumed it with hungered fervor. And now here I sit. Regretting every minute of it.

And what, you may ask, would I call such a dietary disaster? It's ingenious. Spa-ghetto. I call it spa-ghetto. Here is how you make it:

1. Make boxed macaroni and cheese.
2. Slather with ketchup.

It's even easier than 1-2-3 because there is no third step! Now, when you are at a loss in the kitchen, just remember this easy solution! It saves time, tastes great (okay, it is freaking disgusting), and then you're onto your next chore until baby wakes up!